2008-05

Late this afternoon, me and my 4 years old daughter went to a shopping mall to buy some personal things and to buy some groceries. While walking inside the mall some men keeps looking and smiling at me and my baby asked me, mama did you know them? and I said no I don’t know them. Why they smiled at you and you smiled back? and I said to her, nothing baby it’s just like being friendly they smile at me so i smile at them too that’s all. While I’m getting my personal stuff, she told me. Mama when I grow up I want to be like you. and I asked why? I want to be pretty like you. I want my hair long and i want to have brown hair color like you, I just want to be like you! And then I smiled at her and said. don’t worry baby when you grow up you will look exactly like me because your my daughter. and she said really mama! One sales lady smiled at us and asked “Madam is she is your daughter?” and I said yes! and she said again she doesn’t look like you maybe she looks like her father and I said yes. and the sales lady told me “your child admire you so much and she is very proud of you as her mother” and I said thank you for your compliments. My daughter looks up to me and I’m happy for that but it makes me more conscious of my actions. At her age that’s the stage of idolizing one person and it just happens that it’s me her mother. I remember when I was same as her age I idolized my auntie the sister of my father so i know her feelings. Being a mother I want the best for her, I want her to be beautiful, loving, charming and sweet most especially I want her to be a good person and a God fearing individual.

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There was one moment in my life, when I was so down and I need someone to talked with to comfort me and a shoulder to cry on. I asked myself where are they now? What is a friend? Some says friendship is sovereign antidote against all calamities. I realized some of my friends are fair-weather friends. who walks with me in a sunshine, but they are gone when darkness falls. “Wealth brings many friends”. But there was one friend. I’ve known her for so long we don’t met regularly because she’s so busy to her business. I never thought that she’s the one who will showed me what is the real friendship all about. Best friend, my well spring in the wilderness. I’m so lucky to have her in my life for she’s one of my true friends i had until now. It made me realized that friendship is like money, easier made than kept. “A friend in need is a friend indeed.” I was betrayed by my best friend before so it’s hard for me to trust again. friendship is tested by time and time really does have a way of healing deep hurts. Time allows forgiveness to wash away anger and keep us healthy. Tragedy reminds me what is really important in life- is relationships. I learned to choose my friends and to choose friends to die for.

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I felt so sad for my friend. We had a heart to heart talk this late afternoon after work. She have a big personal problem, a love problem. She is so confused and so in love to a married man. Oh my God! I don’t know what to say. All I know is the feeling of being in love. I understand her situation but being in love to a married man is a different thing. complicated and it’s wrong feelings. The worst thing is the man doesn’t know that this woman is falling in love with him. It’s just happens so fast I told her maybe it’s only an infatuation. But she assure me it’s love. Love? what kind of love? right love at the wrong time? Being a good friend I advice her not to fool herself to a man that doesn’t know anything about her feelings, and never expect that this man will love her back think herself than her feelings to this married man. My friend is smart but when it comes to love she doesn’t know what is right for her. It’s a one sided love affair. We all know that love is blind. But the greatest thing we’ll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return. And if there is anything better than to be loved, it is loving. Human heart at any age, opens only to the heart that opens in return. I care for my friend and i don’t want her to get hurt because it will hurt me too. I will try to lead her to the right way with the help of God.

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