2008-05-02

Today is my down fall day. a bad day for me. The feeling that I can’t explain. I feel so depressed. the feeling of alone for so long, the emptiness inside of me. What is happening to me? Or just missing my family? I miss my mother, my father, my siblings. I miss my childhood days those where the days that I can say I’m happy with a complete and happy family. Or I just need someone to talk with? I don’t know! All I know at this moment is to cry. I’m so stupid! Crying without any reason, I don’t know what really happening to me. The worst is thinking to end my life without any reason. Do I need medical help? Am I losing my sanity? Is God is with me now? Lord help me. Please show me the way the right way to think in a positive way. Is this normal for human being that sometimes in your life you feel so desperate or you feel no one loves you? I’m so tired of being alone and independent in my life. Is this self pity? or depression? Or just a simple act of longing for someone I love? So many questions that need time to know what is the reason behind for all of this. God please give me a peace of mind….

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