My Heart And Me

Everyone wants love. I dream about it, fantasize about a perfect partner and visualize finding a lasting relationship. Yet in my real life, the right partner can seem endlessly elusive. I believe that there is one special person for everyone. I found that people had different ideas about what soul mate was. But for me I described it as relationship where the couple were friends as well as lovers. It’s a strong bond between two people that has existed over many incarnations. They are not necessarily love relationships. I love reading love story books and watching love story movies too to recapture the feelings of a couple falling in love and hopefully, living happily ever after. In my own experience the hard part is finding that special person but I believe that I can. It might seem as if I’ll never find my soul mate. There may be a lesson in this. There are experiences I need to go through first. I maybe have to experience a difficult relationship first. Maybe I need to learn patience. I’m confident that my soul mate is out there and he is looking for me. For now all I need to do is to think my soul mate at night as I drift off to sleep to picture him in my mind’s eye as clearly as I can, and seeing myself doing pleasant activities together. by doing this I maybe attract my soul mate while I sleep. If you already found your soul mate your lucky to have him/her in your life. If not, lets try to attract him/her while we sleep. There is no harm in trying think positive! True Love Never Dies…

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Last night I received a text message while lying on my bed and talking to my kids. The message touches my heart. It keeps me wondering because the number is not registered in my phone book. This past few days I’ve been receiving a messages from someone I don’t know. But this message touches my heart and I want to share it with you.

I sit beside you wrapped in thoughtful conversation
feeling too good for comfort… the alarm sounds
and my heart awakens to ask questions
my mind chooses to ignore instead I choose to race with love

And I am off and running… oblivious of what I stand to lose
or how much I gain, I run from love, I run from you
and become entangled in the echo of your laughter…
I shake you loose and still I run from your voice from your kiss…

And the wind becomes your touch enveloping me filling my nostrils
with your scent and I continue my flight away from you…
running… running for my life running for the preservation
of my heart… my soul… my mind… running with my will

Tightly clenched in both hands…I run into my own vulnerability…
and for a moment I’m arrested by a vision of your eyes…
and still I run… until I can run no more…
for I am lost… until I find myself running back to you back to love…

After I read it, I felt I am loved by someone I don’t know? How sweet! It’s like a love that I set free and when it comes back it will be mine forever! To the sender thank you for sharing it to me. What’s a woman supposed to do when a man talks like that!

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I have been watching a soap opera lately. I became intrigued with the story line on one of the soaps because, for me it became a real character study in how different types of behavior affect love relationships. This little drama helped me identify the various ways people choose to communicate. We are to “discern” if an action is right or wrong. We are not to “judge” the punishment the person deserves for his or her wrong doing. Empasses in relationships come from failing to recognize the rights of others and failing to respect the others person’s feelings. I want to share with you the poem I read many years ago.

Can we talk? heart to heart soul to soul in unspoken whispers.
communicating in the spirit sharing our pain, without cutting
one another’s heart, exchanging our tears.
without shouting at each others eyes, without pointing accusatory words
exchanging justifications for unheard sentiments…

Can we talk? like the friends we promised to be
like the lovers we once were hanging on each other’s every word
reveling in each other’s breath we took no easy offense
too eager were we to please too busy being on good behavior

we put our best language forward speaking in loving caresses
no problem being too hard to solve if we put our heads
and our hearts together gently, oh so tenderly touching one
another bruises and fears, cleansing and soothing them

with words of comfort and reassurance with nothing
between us to offer resistance we were honest, we were open
speaking the truth in love seasoned with grace we sought
not to offend but to free one another to love more than before…

but now we’ve grown less careful numbed by days grown
too identical and familiar in each other’s presence…
nothing has changed but us bumping into one another’s feelings
stepping over each other’s spirit ignoring each others souls

we talk behind each others hearts until we become convenient strangers
trapped in silent habits prisoners of senseless rages flailing to find
the point where we first began paralyzed from lack of a map
we sit, we wait, we sigh, we shy away from the obvious… can we talk?

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