2010-02

I feel terribly hurt. I was hurt by someone who is so close to my heart. I considered him as my best friend. Because of some personal reason he decided not to be my best friend. Getting hurt is part of humanity. Getting hurt or causing hurt to others will always be part of our lives for as long as we are in this imperfect world, living with imperfect people and with our imperfect selves. When I love, I risk getting hurt. The fuller I love, the higher the risk of deeper hurts. I could isolate myself from hurts. If you want to avoid of getting hurt, don’t ever love. Do not enter into a meaningful relationships; I have to turn my heart into stone. Stop being a human being; become a piece of wood-without feelings, without relationships, without love, and without hurts. But, I’m thankful, even if hurts is a necessary part of our humanity and a necessary risk from genuine loving and sincere caring for others, hurt may be minimized and managed. It’s so traumatic for me. The friendship that I treasure went to waste. Hurt feelings are inevitable. Lord give me strength to overcome the hurt in my heart.

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Every time I dream, it’s him and in my heart I can feel we will be together. Because the love I feel in my heart the day will come and will be forever. I’ll keep believing this magic. Someday, somehow, my true love will come and this maybe my last day alone. I know there’s someone for me who will always be the one I love. “Love comes unexpectedly… sometimes we are unaware we love in a wrong time and in a wrong place and the worst loving the wrong person.” This song is dedicated to the man that I love so much… In my dream and in my heart you will stay forever… it will take a lifetime to forget you…

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